They Are not Helping

When I say 'they,' I mean some of the people in my life. It is not like they are purposfully making things harder for me, I am pretty positive they are not plotting against me. It is just, sometimes, I do not know what I should do. I love my parents and my close friends, and I really like my other friends. Being around them just seems to put me down sometimes. I just can not seem to put a finger on why it feels like it does.
Let us start with my best friends. We are great together, laughing and yelling, singing and dancing, messing around. But, I look at them, and then myself, and start to feel terrible. It is like they are all so much better then I am, in so many ways. My one friend is a better Musician then I am, and is much more serious and true to her faith then me. And my other friend is prettier and friendlier, and more people like her. Did I mention that they are both athletes too? Yeah, their athletic ablilities are greater then mine as well, which makes me feel even worse about my fat self.
I have other friends then them too. The one seems like he is friends with everyone, which I am totally jealous of, having such terrible people skills. And there are the ones who are amazing artists and writers, who people take seriously as artists and writers. And yet, to almost everyone, I am a joke. And it pisses me off so much.
My parents make me feel terrible too. I love my mother and father, and I know I am lucky to have them both, but some times, I just wish they would leave me alone. My mother is in better shape then I, and when we go shopping, she will reference to: "when I was fat." Do you know what it is like to have a mother skinnier then you? It is terrible, especially when she is constantly rubbing it (indirectly) in your face. It is terrible. And then there is my father. It is like I have to tip toe around him, and do everything I can to not upset him, because if he is unhappy, then everyone is miserable. Just being around him, he who makes me feel like failure, makes me feel terrible.
So, what am I supposed to do, when I feel terrible around the people I care about, and my friends? It is not like I can leave. If I could leave, I would.

The Girl Uninspired